This past week my challenge was one coffee date per day.
My challenge quickly evolved into more than just coffee and more than just one a day. I went on three coffee dates, one happy hour date, two dinner dates, and a breakfast date. I am still in the process of rescheduling a few dates that need to happen.
At the beginning of the week I was pleased with my crazy schedule. I finally scheduled in all the coffee dates that I’ve been putting off and committed to those people in my life who I keep telling, “we’ll have to do something next week, this week is so busy for me.” Being busy had become a bad habit, an excuse and a burden. So I finally got to sit down and catch up with a handful of people that I’ve been meaning get together with for months.
And it was great.
The people, the conversations, the insight and the advice all brought me back down to Earth. I’ve been floating around in a dangerous territory lately full of self-doubt and anxiety; job hunting will do that to you. I noticed after this past week that my friends have this funny way of indirectly reminding me of who I am, and now more than ever I needed those conversations and that reassurance.
But at the same time, when I was with my friends I noticed that my mind was always wandering a little. This past week happened to be one of the most eventful weeks of my semester: school work, sorority events, internship projects, mock interviews and real interviews. When I wasn’t doing something related to school, I was on a coffee date and when I wasn’t on a date, I was preparing for an interview. At times I felt like I couldn’t give everyone my full attention.
So while there is definitely something to be said about making people a priority in life, there is also something to be said about balance. The key to keeping balance is knowing when you've lost it.
And last week I lost it.
I felt like I was in a circus act, juggling six different balls. And when I concentrated on just one of those balls, the rest came tumbling down.
I overcommitted myself to being a friend, which lead to neglecting my role as intern, student and job applicant. And when I attempted to make up for my negligence, I couldn’t be 100% present in the conversations that were important to me.
So I’m trying this new thing where I hold myself accountable to all the roles I play in moderation. I am a friend, a family member and a student. I am a girlfriend, an intern and a member of the sorority.
I’ve been feeling this tension lately to fulfill all my roles at once, which is exhausting and impossible. Instead of doing it all at once, the tension has taught me to be aware that there are, in fact six balls to be juggled. And my ongoing challenge will be to learn how to keep those balls in motion.